Keep

It's not the pain that makes the game, nor is it the score
There's not enough of an "umph," to make me give much more
I don't think that you know, just what it is I mean
I live by day and sleep by night, and God, my soul, does keep

A heart that beats is nice and all, it makes us who we are
But take one sec and look around, and find out who YOU are
Are you the one who swings the seas and sets the moon and stars?
Or have you only one small thing, to bring, to give, in full, your heart

This verse would sound so bad in song, so sing it please do not
But spoken word, who knows, could be, a cuddly, lovely, lot
The Man upstairs is not, in fact, all cuddly, all that much
But fair He is, "I AM" the one, the only one who's just

Keepin it real is all I do, T-Rex, it's all for you
I'm reppin the peeps, without a doubt, who like to not wear shoes
You think that this po'm has come derailed, you're wrong, just let it be
For none, in all my few long years, have dared to challenged me
(that is a false statement, I get challenged all the time)

Letters

What's in a letter?
Like, a mailed letter.
Was there ever a protocol for the layout of letters?
Were there things that one "didn't say"?
I'm sure there were!!
But we've lost those things, haven't we?
This is a lot of questions, isn't it?
Have we forgotten how to produce something that used to be an integral part of long distance communication between lovers, friends, and families?
I think, sadly, we now have a very watered down, meager version of what were once beautiful masterpieces.
Not to dis my cousin, but I was writing one the other day and he said "Are you really doing snail-mail?"
Yes.
But that's the reaction that I'm sure would be prevalent in most people 30yrs and younger.
That's definitely a stat I just made up.
But really, can you not see it too?
Now, being a college student, I finally understand the rapturous joy of getting something in the mail.
I didn't used to get much mail and I didn't used to care.
But now, when most of my loved ones live in a different state, a letter is the closest thing to a real conversation with them.
You can try to prove to me that Skype or FB Chat is sufficient, and waaaay more expedient, and free.
I'll not buy it.
If you have ever received a letter, a real, bonafide, handwritten letter, you know what I mean.
Nothing virtual can come close.
In a letter, you can hear the person's voice actually speaking through the words on the page, and you know it's them.
On Skype, you hear a recording of their voice and a terribly pixelated version of their face.
Now don't get me wrong, I love Skyping with my loved ones, it really is great.
But a letter.
Mmmmmmmm
That's where it's at my friends
That is where its at.
So I challenge you to write a letter to someone close to you, in a different country, state, city, or even dorm.
And pretend that you're just sitting there telling them a story, face to face.
Tell them something you wish you always had the guts to say in real life, or say something important that you always forget to say when you see them.
Cause lemme tell ya, if your recipient is a college student, even if your letter says things they might not want to hear, they will probly jump up and down at least twice in celebration upon receiving your letter.
No Joke.
Just try it and wait for the return letter.
I won't go into the joys, the absolute raptures, of getting a package in this blog.
But that is also a good way to brighten a dreary Monday morning.
To color a dull gray mailbox.
:)
Now, I've got to go and finish writing some letters :)
                                                                   Always Hope, Love Regardless and Peace Out
P.S. This is not a rant about me wanting a letter, but if it moves you to write one, my address is as follows:
John Hoehn
HU 11361
915 E. Market Ave.
Searcy, AR 72149
(postage is only like 44 cents yall, you can do it, for anyone you can think of)

Beauty

I want you to see, with the eyes of a free man, the wonderful things that surround you

For often we're blind, and don't comprehend, the beauty of things that ring true

True beauty is double, defined by itself, confined to no one human's view

But all can perceive it, enjoy and create it, when feelings, to beauty, are moved.

Scroll on....

I have, just know, come across something that I cannot ignore anymore.
Now, I know that of course you have done this, but has anyone ever felt really strongly about something and then kinda let is slip by?
I know that sounds sick.
But I think it's a pretty wide spread disease of our current culture.
And of my current generation.
Then again, doesn't everyone always say we're the "movers and shakers," the kids who will change what they don't like?
Ha.
I'm not here to bash, I'm here to observe and report.
I think the reason for our complacency is also the thing that will carry our memory through history:
The Internet
And this has come to the fore of my mind because it struck me a few minutes ago how easy it is to forget things in our era. This has been revealed to me through the quick come and go, the page surfing, the scrolling, the Home Page browsing.
We see some nuts post on Facebook like "I've just been feeling really down today and I just don't know what I am here for"
Then we either LIKE it?!?! or we comment and say "Hey friend, everything will be ok, I still love you anyway :)"
and while that might be a teensy bit helpful, it really doesn't do much
Now does it?
And the third thing we seem to do is just scroll on, till we find a post that makes us laugh, then we like, comment and move on.
Really?
I do it all the time, so yes really.
I just think its ridiculous.
Which brings me back to my first thought, becoming complacent even about things we feel strongly about.
I have felt "strongly" about the shallowness that Facebook and social media is producing in us.
What have I done?
I have fallen victim to the very thing which I sought to condemn.
So I thought I would do something about it.
Blogging really gets to the heart of the matter, Don't it?
Nah.
ahhh, but honestly the reason I decided to write this is because I saw a post by someone that actually cause me to STOP scrolling!
And we all know, that's hard to do.
Someone posting a link to a missing persons website.
And the picture on it was a little baby, 3 years old, who was abducted.
And the post said something like "praying for a safe return of this child"
I almost scrolled right on, right along with everyone else.
Then I realized, if and since prayer works, we could actually help find this kid
And gee whillickers, a 3 year old got ABDUCTED
Shouldn't that make us stop and say a prayer for his safety?
Shouldn't that makes us stop and realize how depraved our world has come, when babies are the target of crimes?
Shouldn't we want a change?
Welp, we've got more scrolling to do, but it was cool to see that someone cares :)
I was just struck with the sadness of it. A new creation in the world being traumatized, who knows where, away from his family.
And it's 9/11
I saw a FB post like so "When you think about it, 9/11 was kinda hilarious"
What?
It was a little kid hacking his sister's account cause he was mad at her and he wanted everyone on facebook to get mad at her.
That is what the Internet is doing to us yall, its killing our morals.
It's making us feel as though, by liking a Jesus page, we are better Christians for it.
Via the Internet, we are doubling all the information in the world every two years.
And do we understand half of it?
Do we understand the power that we hold in the palm of our hand, in a computer that's so portable yet so powerful?
Or do we scroll on.
I really don't WANT to make you feel bad about being on Facebook, Tumblr, Twitter, or Pinterest.
But I think you should
I think you should realize that social media are selfish media.
I think instead of liking a depressing post you could call your so called "friend" and ask them whats going down.
How much time could you spend doing worthwhile things instead of liking comments?
Like actually learning the information that has been produced.
Cause honestly, The Internet is a lovely tool. And Facebook and co are super great if you miss someone across the world and you have no other contact with them. Or like above mentioned example, you could find out about someone's bad day and then go talk to them about it.
But no.
It's only fair
It's only right that we should
Scroll on
                                            Always Hope, Love Regardless and Peace out

P.S. I really hope a biggoted voice did not come out in this blog, I just wanted to explore this thought more. Please comment if you think different
;) or just scroll on

From Karlie

I'm sitting here in Starbucks, studying, listening to my chilltime playlist, breathing. Maybe the music moves me, maybe it's exhaustion, maybe it's unstable female hormones, maybe it's completely right. But as the music builds and as the homework becomes more and more repulsive, and as unique and beautiful people filter in and out with the steadiness of a stream, my heart starts to ache and long for something unknown, and my eyes start wander. My body feels like crying, and my soul feels like running into the sky. I don't know what I'm supposed to feel like, but I think all the things I invest in distract me from whatever that is. It's deep and its rushing and its terrifying and its beautiful. I want nothing more than to be oblivious to the worlds expectations, and to love people with reckless abandon, pouring every ounce of myself into their souls. I don't know how to to do that. But watching literally hundreds and hundreds of people float mindlessly in and out convinces me that there is more than school and work and being an educated adult. My priorities are in a heap on the floor. I just want to stop wasting this precious, precious drop of time with things that claim to hold value and worth, but make me feel empty. Love is the greatest investment. I never thought I would learn that while doing homework in starbucks. I don't know if any of this makes sense at all, and I'll probably look back on it in five hours and wonder what was in my coffee. It's uncalled for and it's ridiculous. But there is not a single person in this world that isn't just that, even a little. And there's not a person in this world that shouldn't be loved and cherished. It's not my job to save the world, nor am I capable. But it's my job to be one little world. drops start ripples, ripples start waves, and when it rains, I want to give every last bit of my drop. No one could ask me for more, but its even more foolish to ask for nothing at all and tell me to just keep being a good girl. I want to invest. I want to sacrifice. I want to hold. I want to offer. I want to supply. I want to direct. I want to give. I want to become peace. I want to love with a new level of depth. I want to fall into the soul of God Himself and do it with all that I am. I ask for nothing more. And I refuse to ask for anything less. I don't know what any of this means, at all. I'm sorry this is taking twenty minutes of your life. I don't know if this is significant at all, or if I'll be embarrassed about it in two days. And I don't know if it's right, or wrong, or completely outrageous. But to me it's worth entertaining the fact that we could be doing everything completely wrong, if we discover that deep within us is the way to do it right. Thanks for listening to my abstract mind, like I said, I don't know what this means. I don't know what possessed me to write it. But I had to, so I did, and I had to share it with someone, so I shared it with you. If you see a grain of sanity and an ounce truth buried in it somewhere, hold me to a new standard. And maybe give me a little feedback. Thanks for your time. 

No credit goes to me for this blog post, I am just the messenger. If you know Karlie Mountjoy, let her know what you thought :) 

Chasing Cars

Has anyone heard the song Chasing Cars ?
Its pretty good.
It also carries a lot of memories with it, for me anyway.
In order to protect the innocent, at least from most of the dangers that could come with this, I'll use false names.
Now I've got your attention, don't I ;)
So this song used to be the "theme song" if you will, of me and the girl I had a crush on in 7th grade
I'll call her Doris.
And really, I don't think this would really hurt anyone, including her, I just didn't ask prior to telling.
Those that were close will know anyway.
But obviously, they were close.
So I thought I loved Doris.
I was 12.
I had just broken from the homeschool scene onto the private christian school scene and I was feeling rebellious.
My parents didn't allow us to date while we were living at home, but since I no longer stayed in my house all day, I saw an opportunity for rule beeeeending.
I was a little green, to say the least.
And I would say, 7th and 8th grade were my most rebellious because of my few "Illicit" and "Undergound" relationships.
Psh.
So anyway, Doris and I passed notes in class, in a secret language that we created.
Well, her and some other of our friends created it and I just used it in case our teacher got a hold of these amorous letters.
So, we held hands a total of 2 times I think? In youth group no less.
I know, you're thinking "This guy is out his mind!"
;)
I was new to it all, ok?
well, we made our own words to chasing cars, but we still enjoyed the original lyrics together.
I thought it would last forever.
But then I realized that a 12yr old's feelings change and one really shouldn't base one's future plans solely on feelings.
It just doesn't work out right.
So, I won't give myself any good rep about this, we kinda petered out and our friendship became rather strange.
That song also became a bit of a bad memory.
I didn't listen to it for a long time., because of that.
But recently, as much as a year ago, I heard it again and it reapplied to my life.
But with a different person.
:D
And this person deserves a whole blog to herself.
But I'll say a little here. Because otherwise, this blog would be pointless.
no plot.
She has ... Ahh.. such lovely hair.
And eyes the color of a stormy ocean. That may sound like they're icy.
But they're comforting.
You'd have to see them to know :P
But physical features, while not few in number, do not define this fine woman's wonderful nature
Don't get the impression that I think her an angel.
She has her share of shortcomings, the most painful to me of which is her willingness to go on dates with people other than me.
But they don't define her.
The thing that you should really know about McKenzie is that she is a fighter.
Her life has been sooo much rougher than mine.
And she may tell you otherwise, but it has affected her, in involuntary ways.
But the nuts thing is, she has realized some of those things and changed them, voluntarily
And some of the things are still in the works. And yes, some are still unknown
But the pros?
:)
Let me just try and describe them.
ya see, we have this mental connection that allows us to communicate in nonverbal ways and when we're together, it just magnifies everything.
She has such a passion for keeping people in a good state of mind and even though her relationship with God is exactly what she wishes it was, I've seen her help other struggling souls along the way.
Myself included.
Now to all my family members that may read this, I know you're either really dissapointed that I still feel so amorous towards McKenzie, vomiting at the thought, or maybe you might just be happy for me.
All I know is we're not gonna make any crazy decisions any time too soon.
And no, she DOESN'T get in the way of my friendship with God.
That roadblock would be myself not making time, not anyone else.
To all you other readers, I don't know if you took anything from this blog, but I would say this:
If you're a girl, try to meet her and take notes
If you're a boy, back off and mourn the fact that you'll never be with her
and in general, everyone, never go into a relationship with selfish ambitions.
And always, always, always, leave it in God's hands.
He's the ultimate matchmaker and He runs on a different time schedule than us.
Hard to swallow, I know.
Did I mention her huggability? McKenzie just fits right in my arms, something I sadly haven't experienced in a few monthes.
But it's ok.
Because "True love will always find a way and I will always come for you"
And I love McKenzie. Be it friends, be it collegues, be it brothers and sisters or be it spouses.
"If I lie here, if I just lie here, would you lie with me and just forget the world?"
                                                                                     Always Hope, Love Regardless, and Peace Out
P.S. If you readers would all pray that God reveals His plan to us, that would be so lovely of you :)